The Loot

That's what it feels like.

This desperate scramble for wealth and the 'look at me I've made it' mentality.

And I will admit, I've bought into it, just a tad bit and I don't blame anyone else for doing so, I learnt from my colonial fathers, they taught me best. After all, 'money' makes the world go round (I hope you know it really doesn't).

Living in a country that doesn't have a lot and will do anything in her capacity to hold on to the little power she has left, is pretty much what you have to do to survive in this world. We no longer work together, we compete, the negative kind that is. What is yours is not mine and you'll make me very aware of it the moment I get too comfortable. You will have to do your very best and even if you were good enough, if someone better comes along, please do have a reclined seat somewhere in the back whilst I waltz my way into victory.

No we cannot all get along. I  cannot accommodate and tolerate. I'm grown enough to not deal with theatrics of life. What are you doing and where have you been?  God forbid, I be myself in an interview. Quiet, demure; I don't give you a lot, just enough to keep you interested and see me work.

After you have gathered your spoils and arranged all the letters besides your name that you are entitled to have, please tell me what is left?

My loot is adventure, occasional comfort and work I WANT to do.  I'll show off my work when it is finished and I'll credit whoever needs to be credited...so you can spend your spoils on my spoils.

Delirious Me

A Note to Self:

Lady,

I understand you have experienced a moment of selflessness and you have ravaged in your impulsive habit but today, you will dig out whatever dignity you have left and dust off your mask of pride. Put it on!

You cannot walk in your heels of confidence just yet but the cloak of humility has never looked better.

The next time you ever go back on your word after much thought, coaching and common sense, I will bury you alive.

Retrospect is a gift you have been given, use it to your advantage. I cannot have parts of me in tatters when I have worked so hard to put back together your self esteem. Do not undo my hard work.

I am part of your personality one of the positive characteristics that still exits. Yes, dignity, pride, humility and esteem, we had an emergency meeting in your moment of weakness. The floride in your toothpaste has not slowed you down but it seems to have accentuated the coon or the potential desperate housewife in you.

We have invested in overthinking and the occasional walk on the common to get you out of this emotional downward spiral you are content in dragging yourself into.

Read a book, write again and stop tweeting...but no! You do what you feel. Clearly age does not come with maturity but we are working on it.

We are aware it is winter, wrap up warm and escape into the world of literary devices, possibly relearning grammar and work.

The past is a wonderful illusion that you love to drown yourself in, but you have not utilised these moments in a positive way, rather they seem to have a negative effect on you.

This mirror, called your diary, try reading it. It will help you. This is your most honest place. We'll review your improvement in 3 months time.

Victoria Awosode is synonymous with Seun Amusan.